Ethics of Christianity Essay
It is very easy to stand up my beliefs in the Lord when I am in the comfort of my home; where life seems so simple. I enjoy my home very much and my time here with my husband. My hobbies are photography, gardening, and building things; this is all therapy for me, and more so, this is where I love to worship, and learn from the Lord. However, writing has always been my passion, but I could not write very well; my reading skills were at 4th grade level, and my comprehension skills were limited as well; someone told me I was stupid when I was a child and I believed that. When I first came to Jesus, He told me to journal everything; so, I did. I journaled scripture daily; I could not just read something and walk away; I needed to absorb what I was writing into the depths of my being. One day at church, I wrote a story and shared it with a friend, she gulped because she could not understand what I wrote, and suggested I go back to school! The following week when I returned, I had written another story, and she asked if my daughter had written it for me? I said no, the Holy Spirit taught me; she didn’t believe me. You see, God hears the hurtful words the world bestows upon His children, and although, these seem to produce what they intend, He already had a plan for me. I have learned so much from the Lord about my mental health, physical health, and spiritual health. Depression and shame kept me in prisoned for many years. The shame from my past, and regretting the choices I made, and allowed. Because I was such a mess, I believe the Lord was very tender in His teachings with me; He never gave me more than I can handle mentally. I grew up in a very religious family, and they used the Bible to control me. My stepdad was the son of a Pastor, and he beat us constantly. His father knew what we were enduring and did nothing, so Christianity was never something I accepted easily; I literally ran Christians off, nor was I able to believe anything anyone shared with me about Jesus’ love for me until my younger sister invited me to go to church on an Easter Sunday. The only reason I went is because she was just as messed up as I was, and I see the change in her life; I wanted that if only it was true. As I stood during worship, I was suddenly filled with an overwhelming feeling of love; it was a consuming love and acceptance I never knew. I felt like I was being washed from all my filth. I cannot testify about something I do not believe myself. And although my husband was very controlling and emotionally abusive towards me, he could not take away the joy I felt from Jesus that day; my husband gave his life to Christ a week later.
I believe my relationship with Jesus is powerful because people who know me, or have known me, and know my past, have seen with their own eyes my changed life because of Him. I journaled my daily walk with Him, and every day, He became more real to me because I was so controlled by the world, and their approval of me. I was paralyzed to do anything on my own. I doubted myself, and I could not make simple daily decisions on my own; I was always told what to do. I questioned myself and my motives consistently; this was the negative core belief that was instilled in me. I needed Jesus to help me get through the moments of everyday and began journaling in Day’s Journey, by the way, that was His idea. For me, it as if the Lord was reaching His Hand towards me, and saying, “Take My Hand, we can do this together”. And every day I began to walk with my eyes fixed on Him; one day at time. Future thoughts were too overwhelming for me, so He told me to trust Him in the day called Today. Through Day’s Journey, the Lord not only brought me closer to Him but others as well. This is one tool God uses to share the Gospel of His Son, and I share because if not for my fellowship with Him, I would have committed suicide; I could not keep going on living that way.
The way I maintain the strength to remain pure of heart, is by keeping my relationship with Jesus. I do so by spending time with Him and staying in fellowship with Him. He guides through His word, which I read myself. One day someone told me that God said this or that. I said, “If God has something to say to me, He will tell me Himself”! I know this may sound arrogant, but as I have shared, religious people used the Bible to control me for their own pleasures. I love the Lord so much, I endured such treatment, until the Lord showed me that was not His intentions for me. Every day, I am more confident in His love and approval of me, and I pray that He be magnified in everything I do; even while I work as a house cleaner. I pray for His help to love others as He has loved me and give me everything, He has to maintain my relationship with Him, (Ephesians 6, Philippians 4).
When I am persecuted, He reminds me that it is not me that they are persecuting, but Him. I too persecuted Him when I chased away Christians; it was not them I was chasing away; it was Jesus I chased away. When others mistreat me, I remember how I mistreated Him. When my own family rejected me, I cried and said, “Lord, rejection hurts so bad”, He said, “I know” I then remembered all the times I rejected him and yet He never rejected me! Everything others had done to me; I had done to Jesus and yet He forgave me and welcomed me back with open arms; this is also how I can keep moving forward when the world and it’s evils try to deceive me, and lure me away from my Shepherd (Psalms 23).
The world has nothing I want nor am I need of anymore. When I finally died to the world, the world in me no longer had power over me.